Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
HipKat

Hunter Thompson, Donald Trump and The Death of Richard Nixon

Recommended Posts

I was reading about Hunter Thompson and his journey to a post modern Pop Star and I came across something he had written about Nixon, post mortem. I substituted Trump's name in place of Nixon's and it never lost a step (other than the deceased references)...

(I omitted segments that referenced Nixon's cabinet, Viet Nam and Kent State University)

He Was a Crook

 

[Donald Trump] is gone now, and I am poorer for it. He was the real thing -- a political monster straight out of Grendel and a very dangerous enemy. He could shake your hand and stab you in the back at the same time. He lied to his friends and betrayed the trust of his family....

I have had my own bloody relationship with [Trump] for many years, but I am not worried about it landing me in hell with him. I have already been there with that bastard, and I am a better person for it. [Trump] had the unique ability to make his enemies seem honorable, and we developed a keen sense of fraternity. Some of my best friends have hated [Trump] all their lives. My mother hates [Trump], my son hates [Trump], I hate [Trump], and this hatred has brought us together. [Trump] laughed when I told him this. "Don't worry," he said, "I, too, am a family man, and we feel the same way about you."

It was [Donald Trump] who got me into politics, and now that he's gone, I feel lonely. He was a giant in his way. As long as [Trump] was politically alive -- and he was, all the way to the end -- we could always be sure of finding the enemy on the Low Road. There was no need to look anywhere else for the evil bastard. He had the fighting instincts of a badger trapped by hounds. The badger will roll over on its back and emit a smell of death, which confuses the dogs and lures them in for the traditional ripping and tearing action. But it is usually the badger who does the ripping and tearing. It is a beast that fights best on its back: rolling under the throat of the enemy and seizing it by the head with all four claws.

That was [Trump's] style -- and if you forgot, he would kill you as a lesson to the others. Badgers don't fight fair, bubba. That's why God made dachshunds.
...

 

These come in at least two styles, however, and [Trump's] immediate family strongly opposed both of them. In the traditionalist style, the dead president's body would be wrapped and sewn loosely in canvas sailcloth and dumped off the stern of a frigate at least 100 miles off the coast and at least 1,000 miles south of San Diego, so the corpse could never wash up on American soil in any recognizable form.

The family opted for cremation until they were advised of the potentially onerous implications of a strictly private, unwitnessed burning of the body of the man who was, after all, the President of the United States. Awkward questions might be raised, dark allusions to Hitler and Rasputin. People would be filing lawsuits to get their hands on the dental charts. Long court battles would be inevitable -- some with liberal cranks bitching about corpus delicti and habeas corpus and others with giant insurance companies trying not to pay off on his death benefits. Either way, an orgy of greed and duplicity was sure to follow any public hint that [Trump] might have somehow faked his own death or been cryogenically transferred to fascist Chinese interests on the Central Asian Mainland.

It would also play into the hands of those millions of self-stigmatized patriots like me who believe these things already.

If the right people had been in charge of [Trump's] funeral, his casket would have been launched into one of those open-sewage canals that empty into the ocean just south of Los Angeles. He was a swine of a man and a jabbering dupe of a president. Nixon was so crooked that he needed servants to help him screw his pants on every morning. Even his funeral was illegal. He was queer in the deepest way. His body should have been burned in a trash bin.

...but I have written worse things about [Trump], many times, and the record will show that I kicked him repeatedly long before he went down. I beat him like a mad dog with mange every time I got a chance, and I am proud of it. He was scum.

Let there be no mistake in the history books about that. [Donald Trump] [is] an evil man -- evil in a way that only those who believe in the physical reality of the Devil can understand it. He [is] utterly without ethics or morals or any bedrock sense of decency. Nobody [trusts] him -- except maybe the Stalinist Chinese, and honest historians will remember him mainly as a rat who kept scrambling to get back on the ship.

...

... was only one of the many historians who suddenly came to see [Trump] as more than the sum of his many squalid parts. He seemed to be saying that History will not have to absolve [Trump], because he has already done it himself in a massive act of will and crazed arrogance that already ranks him supreme, along with other Nietzschean supermen like Hitler, Jesus, Bismarck and the Emperor Hirohito. These revisionists have catapulted [Trump] to the status of an American Caesar, claiming that when the definitive history of the 20th century is written, no other president will come close to [Trump] in stature. "He will dwarf FDR and Truman," according to one scholar from Duke University.

 

 

It was all gibberish, of course. [Trump] was no more a Saint than he was a Great President. He was more like Sammy Glick than Winston Churchill. He was a cheap crook... and he denied it to the day of his death...

Some people will say that words like scum and rotten are wrong for Objective Journalism -- which is true, but they miss the point. It was the built-in blind spots of the Objective rules and dogma that allowed [Trump] to slither into the White House in the first place. He looked so good on paper that you could almost vote for him sight unseen. He seemed so all-American, so much like Horatio Alger, that he was able to slip through the cracks of Objective Journalism. You had to get Subjective to see Nixon clearly, and the shock of recognition was often painful.

He got away with his sleazy "[Make America Great Again" speech... because most voters heard it on the radio or read about it in the headlines of their local, Republican newspapers. When [Trump] finally had to face the TV cameras for real in the [2016] presidential campaign debates, he got whipped like a red-headed mule. Even die-hard Republican voters were shocked by his cruel and incompetent persona. Interestingly, most people who heard those debates on the radio thought Nixon had won. But the mushrooming TV audience saw him as a truthless used-car salesman, and they voted accordingly...

When he arrived in the White House, ... - a hubris-crazed monster from the bowels of the American dream with a heart full of hate and an overweening lust to be President. He had won [the] office he'd run for and stomped like a Nazi on all of his enemies and even some of his friends.

...

That is [Donald Trump], in a nut, for people with seriously diminished attention spans. The real story is a lot longer and reads like a textbook on human treachery. They were all scum, but only [rump] walked free...

[Trump]liked to remind people of that. He believed it, and that was why he went down. He was not only a crook but a fool. ...he told a TV journalist that "if the president does it, it can't be illegal."

...

 

 

[Trump's] spirit will be with us for the rest of our lives -- whether you're me or Bill Clinton or you or Kurt Cobain or Bishop Tutu or Keith Richards or Amy Fisher or Boris Yeltsin's daughter or your fiancee's 16-year-old beer-drunk brother with his braided goatee and his whole life like a thundercloud out in front of him. This is not a generational thing. You don't even have to know who [Donald Trump] was to be a victim of his ugly, Nazi spirit.

He has poisoned our water forever. [Trump] will be remembered as a classic case of a smart man shitting in his own nest. But he also shit in our nests, and that was the crime that history will burn on his memory like a brand. By disgracing and degrading the Presidency of the United States, by fleeing the White House like a diseased cur, [Donald Trump] broke the heart of the American Dream.

 


“There he goes. One of God's own prototypes.

A high-powered mutant of some kind, never even considered for mass production.

Too weird to live, and too rare to die.”

 

Twitter: @HKTheResistance

 

HipKat, on *** other h***, is genuine, unapoli***tically nasty, and w**** his hea** on his ******. jc856

I’ll just forward them to Bridgett. comssvet11

Seek help. soflabillsfan

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

 

  • Haha 1

process.jpg
seandelevan said:
Fuck this team
StraightJ said:
I'll tie a frying pan to my ass so you hurt your penis, you ****ing homo!
BertSquirtgum said:
Shut the fuck up dark cloud pussy
Mainejays said:
Anyone who is foolish enough to not be a Buffalo Bills fan can go f*ck themselves with a wooden shovel handle.
image-trump-emoticon.png
212frawk said:
also, all that shit in your signature is beyond annoying. just like you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Woody said:

Which has nothing to do with the OP - common trait of dumbfounded Trumpanzees who've been shut down


“There he goes. One of God's own prototypes.

A high-powered mutant of some kind, never even considered for mass production.

Too weird to live, and too rare to die.”

 

Twitter: @HKTheResistance

 

HipKat, on *** other h***, is genuine, unapoli***tically nasty, and w**** his hea** on his ******. jc856

I’ll just forward them to Bridgett. comssvet11

Seek help. soflabillsfan

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This reminds me, where is Raoul Duke been lately?

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
22 minutes ago, jc856 said:

This reminds me, where is Raoul Duke been lately?

Oh yeah, good question


“There he goes. One of God's own prototypes.

A high-powered mutant of some kind, never even considered for mass production.

Too weird to live, and too rare to die.”

 

Twitter: @HKTheResistance

 

HipKat, on *** other h***, is genuine, unapoli***tically nasty, and w**** his hea** on his ******. jc856

I’ll just forward them to Bridgett. comssvet11

Seek help. soflabillsfan

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Sign in to follow this  

×
×
  • Create New...